Friday, October 16, 2009

The Simple Act of Kindness

No one can ever you prepare you for it... meaning your life purpose, but when it does come you have to be ready to go. Plain and simple.

I grew up in one of the most dysfunctional families you probably would ever meet. My parents married and divorced when I was five years old. I then watched my mother marry and divorce two more times and my life was hell, watching her slide into her pit of nothingness.

So when I met my husband I had a lot of luggage.... meaning, preconceived ideas of what families where like. I never in my wildest dreams ever thought that I would receive healing from the very family that the Lord gave me. Healing from hurts, trusting again and along the way... never expecting that the best friendship I would ever receive would be from my first born.

She and I are so different in so many ways, but we also respect and listen to each other. Honesty is at the top of our list and I will tell you that I get more scoldings from her than she gets from me. I'm a wild card at times and she is steady. But along with this friendship has come trials with her health... horrible painful trials and she continues to endure. She has asked if she can give up and stop fighting... but I tell her "No." It's simple and it's selfish, but I do not think that my life would be the same if I didn't have her there to talk too. From the outside, it looks like she needs me, but the truth is that I need her more.

The unfathomable love of God... to bless me unexpectingly with such a treasure. I think of Jonathan and David from the Bible. Jonathan was David's armour bearer and that's how I feel for my girl... I would give my life for her.

So I continue in this life, trusting my Lord more than I ever have and at the same time giving up trying to control the very things that have become such a treasure. My family. My life source of who I've become. It's funny when you think about it, but my name means Grace and that's exactly what I've become... an example of God's grace.

God's simple act of kindness is that I never needed anything in this life except my salvation. And in return I've received so much more.

Until Tomorrow,
Java Girl

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